True stories of utter failure: Golden Axe (PC-Engine CD)

[Black Tiger]

Night Creatures!

I only commited myself to beating it because of the challenge(and it's still a Turbo game), so I could at least tell myself that I actually did it.

A few years later an online friend commented on it saying how noone could beat it and how he'd give anything to see the ending.

So I mapped out the game again, making a walkthrough in the process and sent him a VHS tape of the last area and ending.

Although before beating it, I still thought that it had a lot of pottential had it been developed properly, learning to compensate for the game's shortcomings gameplay wise has made me appreciate it all the more.

It, even more so than Shape Shifter was Symphony Of The Night years before SOTN/NITML even came out.

Honestly, if the game wasn't such a challenge, I wouldn't respect it for what it is the way I do.

[twor2005]

Night Creatures!

I only commited myself to beating it because of the challenge(and it's still a Turbo game), so I could at least tell myself that I actually did it.

A few years later an online friend commented on it saying how noone could beat it and how he'd give anything to see the ending.

So I mapped out the game again, making a walkthrough in the process and sent him a VHS tape of the last area and ending.

Although before beating it, I still thought that it had a lot of pottential had it been developed properly, learning to compensate for the game's shortcomings gameplay wise has made me appreciate it all the more.

It, even more so than Shape Shifter was Symphony Of The Night years before SOTN/NITML even came out.

Honestly, if the game wasn't such a challenge, I wouldn't respect it for what it is the way I do.

I always thought that one would be fun if it was just a bit more possible or played a bit better. I wonder if anyone could hack it to make the controls a bit better? Heck i'd settle for an invincibility hack. Same thing with ghoul's and ghosts on the supergrafx.

[Michael Helgeson]

So sence you never read any game mags,how did you learn about new games coming out?Did you get news letters from someone on a Unix cash account or something who lived in Japan?Did you just have to check your local Toys R Us to see what new Turbo games they had?Go to Wal-Mart alot for the new Nes titles?
That would blow.
BTW GameFan covered every system with as much detail as possible,even the FM Towns Marty.I dont remember them sticking to just any certain one or 2 favs.

And no,I dont have any GameFan mags anymore,I gave them to a local game store owner here in town a year ago.He gave me  a import Dreamcast in the box complete.It was the special box with the stupid looking Sega employee on it who got his ass kicked in a tv ad over there before the DC was released.it was the "We may be down but not out" ad.
I fetched over 100 bucks for that thing,so I was pretty happy with the trade.I never slept with a mag of any kind under my binky,if I did I wouldnt have kids now ,or a life for that matter.Speaking of having a life,when is your shareware title for Magic Engine going to be done?Is it going to be free,or am I going to have to pay 10 bucks to get the full game?

[ParanoiaDragon]

Black_Tiger, you wouldn't by any chance be Kabuki from the old Turbo Grafx Network, would ya   He's the only one I knew of that made a walkthru for Night Creatures & Neo Metal Fantasy, plus, low n' behold, your avatar is Kabuki!  I'm Projectblowed_mc over there, I'm doing music for the Frozen Utopia group now, we got some great stuff planned!

[Michael Helgeson]

O yea,I kind of noticed,its basically just the 2 of you with negative replies back towards me here Nodtveidt and lord_cack.So besides making shareware together,planning on how best you can get around to making the next Zelda clone by rehashing the same old sprites from the last 2,oops I mean Netopia 3,and spending your time "together" trying to knock me on this forum here,am I  to assume you guys do more then that?Do you do everything as a team?
And sence we are on the subject of bad games,untill yours "finally ever" get released,come out as a download or whatever,how do we know yours isnt going to be the next worst suck ass game ever made?Right there with Turrican,or TV Sports Basketball,or the U.S. Last Battle?Heck your crap could even end up being voted worse on here,then maybe even Street Combat on Snes,which Im sure some here remember,as it was Ranma 1/2 raped of all its worth.But hey,sence both of you are true judges on whats bad,maybe you will overcome all this and they will blow our minds away,with a truely great story,graphics with great animation,voice acting,music,control,and what ever else you know must be put in there to make it a "whats according to you" great game.
Well see soon wont we....

[ParanoiaDragon]

I'm also apart of Frozen Utopia, & I'm not bashing you or anything.  I didn't think they we're but I didn't really pay attention to their posts.  As for games we got coming, he he, we got some nice stuff coming  I'm not saying I'm the best composer ever, I wish I could be up there with Ryo Yonemitsu, but, everything takes time.  And my stuff is pretty good good.  Our first game, Mysterious Song, it's cool, I like the story n all, so it won't be voted as a sack of suck.  Neutopia 3 is just plain gonna kick arse, not to mention Rudoshyn, Dragon Arm, & whatever else we decided on, as time goes on.  Saying our games are gonna suck is like going up to BT Garner & spitting in his face.  Anyways, I ain't mad, I'm sure you'll enjoy the games

[Michael Helgeson]

We wont know or play anything untill they are done will we.
I do however think that it would be a sad turn of events if you got a project done and everyone however did think that the overall product did suck,and everyone bashed your game here infront of everyone..Id  hate to see that happen to anyone.The last homebrew project I ever burned off made me sick,that was super hu-card.Barely anything on it even worked without major bugs.Are you having that problem right now?From the tech side of things,I have been wondering how you will overcome these problems.Also,anyone ever thought of trying to contact Victor Ireland of WD to maybe get input on programing tricks of the hardware?

[ParanoiaDragon]

On Mysterious Song, there's no bug problems that I know of.  We're waiting for the cinemas to be finished, & getting ready to do voice acting, but just looking for the right people, for the right roles.  As for Neutopia 3, I've done several songs, 2 are finished.  But we haven't officially started working on it, until Mysterious Song is complete.  I haven't seen any tiles, sprites or mock up's for the levels, but alot of the basic gameplay & level ideas are done.  It's gonna go beyond the other 2 games.  Victor, from my own experience has been hard to directly get ahold of.  The only homebrew games I've played are the ones BT released, Meteor Blaster DX & Implode.  I can't wait for them to finish PC Gunjin, that game looks great!

[nodtveidt]

Well well well Michael, it seems you have just a minor temper problem here. To clarify a few things...

I used to read the game magazines. Don't confuse my dislike of them with ignorance; you cannot hate that which you do not know. The reason I didn't like them is BECAUSE I read them and didn't like the crap they'd spew time and time again.

When it comes to coding the PCE, bt taught me most of what I know. I already knew how to program in C and some of the basics of the console, but bt really taught me how to work with HuC in particular; things to look out for, optimization techniques, avoiding flicker and slowdown, and too many other things to list here. I've also been around Dave Shadoff and have picked up a few things from him, as well as Chris Covell and especially GravisZero. So it's not like you're talking to some acolyte here; I know my stuff and I put it to good use rather than sitting on my ego like some others I've seen.

Where did you get the idea that Mysterious Song was shareware? That's never been written by me or anyone else and isn't written on the website. I've already said that the first two games at least will be freely available for download but also purchasable if we can have them pressed properly. This isn't exactly news.

Your list of games...well, I'll take a look at each one for the hell of it.

Death Duel: Never heard of it.
Pit Fighter: I used to play this game on the arcade a lot. The game had poor execution but was sorta satisfying to knock the hell out of The Warrior and have all the money flying everywhere.
Space Gun: Never heard of it.
Narc: This game was pretty cool. I didn't play it much but I remember it having very crisp graphics for its time.
Sam and Max hit the road: Never played it.
Metal and Lace 1 and 2: Ditto.
Party Breakers: Ditto again.
Robocop: Played it whenever I had the chance. Got the MAME ROM now and have finally beaten the game...about 30 times.
Bad Dudes: This was OK...nothing stood out about it, pretty cut-n-dry stuff.
Way of the Warrior: Never played it.
Crash and Burn: Ditto.
Defender 2000: Hrm...I don't remember this one very well...
Tempest 2000: 110% Badass. Played this on my Jaguar for hours on end until I finally beat the game in Beast mode.
Golvelious: Never even heard of it...
Starblade: Ditto.
Galaxy Fight: UGH! Suck-ass. One of the largest flaws in the NeoGeo game library; even KOF'94 didn't suck THIS bad.
Hellfire: Dunno this game.
Aero Blasters: Played this for a bit; was interesting but never got far in it.
Magic Swords: I believe that's "Magic Sword"...played the SNES port before the arcade version though; it doesn't do the arcade version full justice but it isn't a bad game regardless; both versions are pretty great.
Evil Zone: Never heard of it.
Riot Zone: This game wasn't done very well but that didn't stop me from beating it scores of times. Badass soundtrack. Riot City is arguably better. (Gimme a fscking break...Tony and Hawk?)
Blazing Tornado: Never heard of it.
Stral: Ditto.
Blue Lightning: Never played it but thought it looked sorta like an After Burner clone.
Ninja Gaiden arcade game: Have played it a few times (as well as its counterpart, Shadow Warriors). Never got far in it. It's ok.
Rastan 1 and 2 arcade.: Umm...? Don't know them.

Oops, missed a few...

Silphead for the PC: Never played it. Is this the same as the Sega CD "Silpheed"?
Ultra Vortek:
Shatterhand: Loved it.
The Guardian Legend: Never played it.
Air Busters:
Shock Troopers 2nd squad: Never heard of it.
Beachhead: Ditto.
T2 for the Nes: Yuck.
Road Avenger:
Time Gal: Hate the fact that they renamed it for the dumbass American populace who was so hocked up on "political correctness" at the time. Bullshit in an aeresol can.

Okay well, have you any more personal attacks, Michael? No one was knocking you at all; just mentioning that you like a game that everyone else thinks sucks. My binky comment, which was satirical, seems to be what's now got you on some kind of crusade but hey, I'll let you be the judge of your own attitude. If you're 28 years old, I'd think you'd have a better grip than that.

For the record: Mysterious Song is devoid of bugs in its present form. I've put it through about 60 hours of testing and retesting (I used to be a software beta tester for several dev groups so I know what to look for and what to try to break) and once it's finished completely, it goes to a team of beta testers for 1 month before it's considered release-worthy (most dev houses back in the day would give two or three weeks for testing; bugs often slipped through because of this shorter window). While you may have seen a homebrew crapfest done up by some half-wit out for his fifteen minutes of fame, this is a large group with a lot of very dedicated people in it who are all very talented at what they do and love gaming and this console. It would be a severe disgrace to our beloved console and the entire PCE scene to allow a shitty game to be released. I think even you, Michael, can agree to that.

[Michael Helgeson]

Im wondering what systems you have owned?
Hellfire is a shooter:Pc Engine/Genesis,and arcade.
Beachhead was for the C64,and had many types of "mini games"in it I guess you could say.
Shock Troopers 2nd Squad is a NeoGeo game,a really good one for that matter,how could you have missed that one?
Air Busters/Aero Blasters,depends on what system you have it on,or what arcade board for that matter.Its a shooter by Interstate Kaneko.

The Guardian Legend.Nes game by Compile.Shooter/adventure action game.Borderbund published it in the US.
Ultra Vortek was the only good fighting game for the Jaguar.
Silphead for the PC.GameArts pc shooter brainchild.It was better then the Sega Cd game.

Rastan 1 and 2? By Taito.How could you have missed these in the arcades???
Ninja Gaiden arcade game.Playing it on Mame doesnt count for squat.the game had a special joystick to help with grabbing bars and doing certain swing attacks.It doesnt feel the same on Mame.
Strahl and Road Avenger,both laserdisc titles in the arcade,also released on Saturn import,both games,and Road being on Sega Cd/PSX also.Strahl was released on 3DO here in the US.
Blazing Tornado was made by Human,same company behind Vasteel and the Firo Pro games.On Saturn and arcade in Japan.
Evil Zone was on PSX,played like a fighting game being watched on TV with insane crap inbetween rounds reminding you of Japanese action  and monster shows.
Starblade by Namco? yet again I have to ask how you missed this one.Even if being put to sleep by Tekken 5 you still could get a glimps of the game at the begining.
Golvelious was a adventure game for the Master System by Compile.
Defender 2000 on Jaguar,made by Lamasoft.One of the best Jaguar games made,yet again how could you have missed this one if your a experienced gamer.
Way of the Warrior by Naughty Dog.For the 3DO.Great fighting game with huge sprites and crap going on screen.White Zombie soundtrack.Needs a capcom pad or arcade stick though,or even the pad that came with the FZ-10 system.The FZ-1 pad sucked for fighting games,and many thought they couldnt do the moves in that game because of the game itself,untill new pads came out,that allowed perfect handling of the games moves.
Crash and Burn was the launch 3DO system title.Racing game where you kill the other racers if you cant beat them by other means.Back when it came out,there was nothing like it,period.Virtua Racing was flatshaded polygons,and couldnt compete with it graphically,and Crash and Burn was damn fun to play.Crystal Dynamics made it.

Sam and Max hit the road: Lucas Arts game,one of the best for that matter.
Metal and Lace 1 and 2: hentai fighting game sfor Pc,but they actually play very good.
Party Breakers,one of the Queen of Hearts games for PC,fighting game.If you have not played it,your missing out.Its that simple.
Space Gun,arcade gun game.Good graphics and sound,gave a creepy feeling.Aliens themes abound in the game.Fun to play.
Death Duel for the Genesis.Made by Razorsoft if I remember right.Nice violent game.Plays like a gun shooter or something liek Lethal inforcers,but you moves from side to side,and you only have one enemy to kill.You are in a mech suit and are basically in a duel match against aliens and crap and you kill them dead.Blowing off limbs and what not,going for the kill.Very fun,and great for its time.

[Michael Helgeson]

From the pics,the game you are making looked like another in a long slew of unfinished shareware games slapped on a 1000 games on one cd for pc.This is from looking at the pics.Im being honest that I am not impressed with the graphics.But if your happy with how it looks,that is what matters,as its your project.

[Michael Helgeson]

I thought you might like to read this,sence it might give you a idea of a couple of "true and real" gamers opinions might be like regarding your up and coming game.
here you go straight from the Yahoo archive.


quoth0X : hey you there?
Amakusa: yea
quoth0X : wow
quoth0X : suprised you are still up
Amakusa: fixing to go to bed actually
Amakusa: just checking up on pcengine fx forums
quoth0X : ah i see
quoth0X : yeah i didn't get any of the last stuff you wrote at all
quoth0X : i logged on specifically to see if i got any e-mail on yahoo, and any offline messages, and i waited 10 seconds before closing it out, since none popped up
quoth0X : i put that hard drive in the case earlier
Amakusa: i sent a link to a import playying cart for sega cd
Amakusa: one of those datel carts
Amakusa: you missed it
Amakusa: its over now
quoth0X : send me a link or the item # i want to look at it
quoth0X : how much?
Amakusa: i am not sure
Amakusa: it ended friday nite i think
quoth0X : you remember the subject title?
Amakusa: no
quoth0X : damnit
Amakusa: i wasnt watching it or anything
quoth0X : ah ok
Amakusa: when i sent the message,it had a hour left
quoth0X : i wouldn't have had the money anyway
quoth0X : see i would have still missed it though, i forgot when i checked messager
quoth0X : btw that flash drive i bought, will work with the ps2 - i can back up my saves now, a little bit too late, but still
quoth0X : they have internal hard drives for the new ps2 models now, i think they change the case out
quoth0X : and ds and psp games can be fully dumped and played now, they ported over doom 2 to psp
quoth0X : everything gets hacked eventually
Amakusa: so true
quoth0X : found a bunch of new stuff i can do with the ps2 now since i am putting the hard drive on it, as well as using the flash drive
quoth0X : load a boot menu and all kinds of shit...complicated, but at least i don't have to waste discs to do it all now, like i did the first time
quoth0X : so what do the people of pcenginefx forums have to say today with their endless wisdom?
Amakusa: they have no wisdom,you should know this by now.
quoth09 : ha so true, for the most part
Amakusa: arron Nanto probably still says Duo like"Duel"...
quoth0X : i think that goes without saying
quoth0X : you should start a thread asking about that
Amakusa: Im sure he went back and heard it while making those.
Amakusa: "Today I am going to review Beyound Shadowgate for the TurboDuel system."
quoth0X : heh
Amakusa: Right now im wondering if the guy from Frozen utopia actually owns a game system or has gone to the arcades.
quoth0X : why
Amakusa: I spat ou tthi slist of games,and he hasnt played half of them.
Amakusa: hold on
Amakusa: let me copy the list
Amakusa: Death Duel.
Pit Fighter.
Space Gun.
Narc.
Sam and Max hit the road.
Metal and Lace 1 and 2.
Party Breakers.
Robocop.
Bad Dudes.
Silphead for the PC.
Way of the Warrior.
Crash and Burn.
Ultra Vortek.
Defender 2000.
Tempest 2000.
Shatterhand.
The Guardian Legend.
Golvelious.
Starblade.
Galaxy Fight.
Hellfire.
Air Busters.
Shock Troopers 2nd squad.
Magic Swords.
Evil Zone.
Riot Zone.
Blazing Tornado.
Beachhead.
T2 for the Nes.
Road Avenger.
Time Gal.
Stral.
Blue Lightning.
Ninja Gaiden arcade game.
Rastan 1 and 2 arcade.

Amakusa: He didnt even know what Shock Troopers was.
Amakusa: Or Starblade fo rthat matter.....
quoth0X : christ
Amakusa: I could kinda understand the pc game smaybe
Amakusa: but Rastan,Starblade,Shocktroopers,Aero Blasters/Air Busters,
Amakusa: then game slike Defender 2k on Jaguar
Amakusa: Guardian Legend
quoth0X : some people just don't know, and therefore are oblivious to "good games"
Amakusa: this guy is supposed to be making a game for the Turbo,yet somehow has missed all these nice games
Amakusa: Hes 30
Amakusa: hes older then me
quoth0X : jeez
quoth0X : eh some people don't know, and are not as fortunate as you and i to know such knowledge
Amakusa: He should remember them,have played them,most of them if hes any kind of gamer at all,worth his weight in salt
quoth0X : unless they hear it from their friends...
quoth09 : salt eh...
Amakusa: maybe he has no friends
Amakusa: and liek I said,seems there is no knowledge at Pcengine fx tonite at least.
quoth0X : heh
Amakusa: he even accused Diehard gamefan of being on the take like crap mags liek EGM
Amakusa: and Game pro
Amakusa: actually he just basically says that gamefan sucked
Amakusa: this is coming from the guy who hates Strata games,so go figure
quoth0X : eh he does not know much then
Amakusa: Considering he hasnt played half the games on that list,from all different platforms,different times,different generes,and considering most all of those ar eclassics,he really makes me wonder.
quoth0X : all his opinions are null and void as far as i am concerned
Amakusa: well he said he didnt liek game mags,and I assumed he just ddint read them then
Amakusa: so I replied back asking how it was basically to not read the mags and have to learn of new games by going to walmart or toys r us to see what was new.
Amakusa: he replied back stating he does read them,but I beg to differ,as yet again,if he did,there is no way over the past 17 years he could have missed all those great games.
quoth0X : yeah really
Amakusa: How in the f*ck could you not notice a game like Starblade in you rlocal arcade
Amakusa: It was f*cking huge
Amakusa: Jesus
quoth0X : heh
Amakusa: and it was a Namco game
quoth0X : i never got to see one, but i know how big it is
quoth0X : but that is only because of my age
Amakusa: god it was even a near release PSX title over here
Amakusa: and was on 3DO also
Amakusa: o Sega CD even had a port
Amakusa: I mean come on....
quoth0X : maybe i didn't get to see one...i just don't remember that well.
Amakusa: but you know what teh game is
Amakusa: have known for the longest tiem now
Amakusa: time
Amakusa: now
Amakusa: lol
quoth0X : yeah i know what it is, definitely
Amakusa: my spelling is crap tonite
quoth0X : heh
Amakusa: well here im going to give you a link to hi ssite real quick
Amakusa: take a look at the pics of the game he is making
quoth09 : k
Amakusa: http://frozenutopia.nodtveidt.net/
Amakusa: take a look
Amakusa: what do you think?
Amakusa: Shareware looking or not?
Amakusa: kinda like sack of flower heart of gold?
quoth0X : what the one screenshot he has up
Amakusa: but not as funny
Amakusa: go to projects
Amakusa: more pics
quoth0X : who is the guy you are talking to on there
quoth0X : what is his name, is he the primary programmer for this
Amakusa: yea
Amakusa: hes the main programmer
quoth0X : no wonder
quoth0X : he is from puerto rico
quoth0X : f*cking 3 world section of u.s.
Amakusa: lol
Amakusa: hey,thats not entirely true,I do believe they have  awal mart there
quoth0X : he is a programmer, been programming all his life, missed out on the titles he should know about
quoth0X : bah, they have wal-marts in mexico, no difference
quoth0X : and canada for that matter
quoth0X : it looks ok
Amakusa: quality wise?
quoth0X : yeah, but it does look like it has that feel
Amakusa: are you hyped from the pics?
quoth0X : not really now
quoth0X : no*
Amakusa: well,the guy wondered why I keep refering to it as shareware looking
quoth0X : i think i am more hyped about printing out my shipping labels right now
quoth0X : does he even know what shareware is?
Amakusa: well no wthat you mettion where he is from,and considering he "says" hes a programmer,I do wonder if he does...
quoth0X : yeah really
quoth0X : it's sad when someone a decade younger than his ass probably knows more about games
Amakusa: Time seemed to pass him by
Amakusa: on that little island of the damned
quoth0X: lol
Amakusa: id have been in hell with no good game saround to play
quoth0X : similar to not having a cd drive for your turbo eh
Amakusa: and the funny thing is,him and one of his buddys are the guys talking about timekillers graphics,yet their game looks liek cheap shareware.
quoth0X : bah, his game looks like garbage compared to time killers
Amakusa: About any game I have seen on the Pc Engine looks better,even older games liek DeathBringer.
quoth0X : lol
quoth0X : his game looks like nes
Amakusa: well,you never know,maybe they will finish it,and it will rock,but considering it is coming from a guy who has missed so many great games during the past 17+ years,and has no clue about any of them,I wont hold my breath as to wether he knows how a good game should be.
Amakusa: Paranoia Dragon
quoth0X : makes me wonder if he has played through the other 2 utopias
Amakusa: This guy is pretty nice,and its sad hes a member of their group
quoth0X : er neutopias
Amakusa: He should start hsi own
Amakusa: sence he has doen soem work before it seems
Amakusa: god my spelling
Amakusa: ]Im sleepy
quoth0X : bah, don't worry about it
quoth0X : you should go to sleep
quoth0X : i have to sometime here in the next few hours - post office day tomorrow
Amakusa: Im afraid I might have a bad dream about being on a island where no good games are
quoth0X : lmao
Amakusa: Do you think fun might be outlawed on his island?
Amakusa: and that is why he hasnt played many games?
Amakusa: good games for that matter?
quoth0X : haha
quoth0X : that's australia
Amakusa: lmfao
Amakusa: dead beat bidder capitol of the world
quoth0X : the land where gta3 was banned
Amakusa: where your garden hose can sink in the sand
Amakusa: The land of Mad Max
quoth0X : and where they think that kangaroos are grand
Amakusa: The fatherland of Mel Gibson,the plunder of christ
Amakusa: the passion of the dollar
quoth0X : lmfao
quoth0X : notice you don't see anything about the redux now
Amakusa: no,but if you act now,you might still be able to order one of those ink pins with the passion logo on it
Amakusa: or  at-shirt
Amakusa: maybe he will do a flik about the jim jones cult next
quoth0X : lol
quoth0X : maybe

[Michael Helgeson]

My faulght on the Magic sword having a s at the end,a typo,with few hours sleep and kids running about,it happens.

[Michael Helgeson]

Bringing you up in the conversation Arron,I just want to say,I really did like the shows you did,I converted them all to Svcd,I just wish they were done at a higher res so that the pic quality would have been better.I keep them on Maxell Pros in my collection of games.But I do have to ask,why is it when you say duo,it sounds like your saying duel?

[nodtveidt]

Wow Michael, five of your own posts in a row...you're quite a character, you know that? I'm not even going to respond to your massive insults and laughable fake conversation on yahoo, of all things. But I will give you a little history lesson and some geographical information as well.

The fact of the matter is that I did not spend my entire life playing video games. I had a social life in my younger years and was very physically active. Problems with my spine have all but halted me being physically active all the time but I still have a social life and I still like to get out of the house and work as well as meet people; friends, family, etc. My life does not revolve around video games; never has, never will. Even now, I don't even play online games; the only online game I ever play is RuneScape, despite what many people around me, including some of my friends, think of it (they think it sucks because it's not the cutting edge of 3D technology).

I've owned a C64, an Atari 2600, an NES (both models), an SNES, a Genesis, a Sega CD, a TurboGrafx 16, a TurboDuo, an Atari Jaguar, a Playstaion, a Playstation 2, a AgemGear, a GameBoy, an Atari Lynx, and many many computers. The games you mentioned that I have not played or have not heard of are games outside of my chosen genres. And again, since my life did not revolve around video games, I did not waste away my afternoons in arcades...I went from time to time whenever I felt like checking out what was new and maybe dropping a couple of bucks here and there.

And I am not originally from Puerto Rico. I was born in Tennessee in 1975, moved to Vermont in 1977, and then moved to Pennsylvania in 2002. I moved down here to Puerto Rico in 2003 not too long after my fiancee passed away. No hablo mucho español, pero estoy aprendiendo.

Puerto Rico has 13 WalMarts, with 4 of them being super centers. WalMart  does not establish themselves in third-world countries so I guess there goes that little theory. Can you two even identify Puerto Rico on a map? Probably not. But I guess your prejudice limits your knowledge of this island, so I'll forgive you this time. Hey, we even have...high-speed internet! And cell phones! And cars! And metro areas! Banks with metal detectors! There are no towns in Puerto Rico...every area is a city, and there are 78 of them. We have 9 Sams Clubs here, and 28 KB Toys (I know this because my wife and I recently inventoried all 28 of them for the stock our company distributes). Third world section of the US?

Well, since you've decided to turn a simple dislike over a single game into a giant flame-fest, I certainly hope you're proud of yourself. You've got the maturity of a 14-year-old...are you sure you're 28? But I guess you can pin this on the fact that you have kids running around, right? I wonder if you beat your kids too. And I'm still waiting for the other "true and real" gamer to have their word. You said there were a couple...well wait, there were two people there so I guess then that one of the "true and real" gamers is you. A little arrogant, are we? I can certainly understand your lack of seratonin due to lack of sleep which brings about emotional instability therefore making you write such things, so...well, it still doesn't make it right to do regardless of your excuse.

And while we're at it here...how about YOU try programming a game that is going to "r0xx0r 0ur s0xx0rz", eh? Put up or shut up, I always say.