^ Coles' notes?
Here's a condensed version, in any case:
A guy came into a forum and asked for hand-outs after an Atari Jaguar ate his balls, his Mega Drive and his Turbo Duo which prevented him from giving cabbage to a Rabbi. Apparently, the Rabbi was actually the evil genius who keeps putting those insta-death spike pits from Keith Courage in Alpha Zones just off screen, so he didn't deserve Cabbage anyway.
Then the Rabbi comes on the forum and explain that actually, he's the reason we got the Gate of Thunder Super CD and spins a heartfelt, warm-blooded speech about being kind to animals and loving your fellow man. He demonstrates this himself by refusing to behead those who had wronged him. Therefore, we all side with him.
But the first guy, who is revealed to in fact be an aging and senile Johnny Turbo, instead goes off the deep end and tries to flood the world in a sea of venus bonktraps. It backfires and he ends up summoning that nigh-unbeatable ballerina boss from the second game, who promptly wipes the floor with him before getting killed herself by Raiden the Thunder God, who uses a fatality just to be sure.
Everybody laughs. The end.
I may have taken liberties with the story, but that's the way I see it.
